WORK FOR A
LIVE LIFE TO EXPRESS
NOT TO IMPRESS
TO MAKE YOUR
WORK FOR A
LIVE LIFE TO EXPRESS
NOT TO IMPRESS
TO MAKE YOUR
Alt National Park Service
To me, the most important movie of 2015 was the police car dash-cam video of the July arrest of Sandra Bland, a 28-year-old African-American woman, in Prairie View, Texas. Not just the three minutes or so of the altercation with a white police officer that resulted in Bland’s being taken to the local jail, where she allegedly hung herself three days later, but the entire 52-minute expanse of the tape, for reasons I’ll discuss in a moment.
To me, the Sandra Bland video is the most important movie of 2015 for the segment that comes about 23 minutes in, after Bland has been taken to jail and we hear Texas state trooper Brian Encinia on his police radio, explaining to his supervisor what happened. In his version, a weary, sullen Bland didn’t answer Encinia monosyllabically until he asked her to put out her cigarette and she said no, and he didn’t drag her out of her car while screaming that he was going to “light her up.” In his version, Bland is “flailing, stomping around,” despite his attempts to “de-escalate her.” He was the calming influence, he maintains. She was the instigator.
If I had been Sandra Bland, I would have put the cigarette out.
I wouldn’t have liked it, but I would have recognized the trooper was pushing because his badge, gun, and ego always tell him he can.
Here are a few of the links in the article, just in case its pay-walled or moved.
My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive; and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humor, and some style.
Try to be a rainbow in someone’s cloud.
I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.
If you don’t like something, change it. If you can’t change it, change your attitude.
One isn’t necessarily born with courage, but one is born with potential. Without courage, we cannot practice any other virtue with consistency. We can’t be kind, true, merciful, generous, or honest.
You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them.
Nothing will work unless you do.
Loving-kindness towards all: the hope that a person will be well; “the wish that all sentient beings, without any exception, be happy.”
Compassion: the hope that a person’s sufferings will diminish; “the wish for all sentient beings to be free from suffering.”
Empathetic joy: joy in the accomplishments of a person—oneself or another; sympathetic joy; “the wholesome attitude of rejoicing in the happiness and virtues of all sentient beings.” Joy in the Company of Others
Equanimity: learning to accept loss and gain, good-repute and ill-repute, praise and censure, sorrow and happiness all with detachment, equally, for oneself and for others. Equanimity is “not to distinguish between friend, enemy or stranger, but regard every sentient being as equal. It is a clear-minded tranquil state of mind—not being overpowered by delusions, mental dullness or agitation.” Equilibrium
“All we experience is preceded by mind,
Led by mind, made by mind. Speak or act with a corrupted mind
And suffering follows
As the wagon wheel follows the hoof of the ox.
All we experience is preceded by mind,
Led by mind, made by mind.
Speak or act with a peaceful mind
And happiness follows like a shadow that never leaves.” – Dhammapada 1-2
I try and live the above. Some days, it’s hard. As a species, I do not think we will survive more than a few more centuries. I do not think we are capable of coming together and working in our own best interests.
Home sapies: “the most pernicious race of little odious vermin that nature ever suffered to crawl upon the surface of the earth.” -(Gullivers Travels)
Daniel Goleman, an American psychologist, developed a framework of five elements that define emotional intelligence:
Self-Awareness – People with high EI are usually very self-aware . They understand their emotions, and because of this, they don’t let their feelings rule them. They’re confident – because they trust their intuition and don’t let their emotions get out of control.
They’re also willing to take an honest look at themselves. They know their strengths and weaknesses, and they work on these areas so they can perform better. Many people believe that this self-awareness is the most important part of EI.
Self-Regulation – This is the ability to control emotions and impulses. People who self-regulate typically don’t allow themselves to become too angry or jealous, and they don’t make impulsive, careless decisions. They think before they act. Characteristics of self-regulation are thoughtfulness, comfort with change, integrity , and the ability to say no.
Motivation – People with a high degree of EI are usually motivated . They’re willing to defer immediate results for long-term success. They’re highly productive, love a challenge, and are very effective in whatever they do.
Empathy – This is perhaps the second-most important element of EI. Empathy is the ability to identify with and understand the wants, needs, and viewpoints of those around you. People with empathy are good at recognizing the feelings of others, even when those feelings may not be obvious. As a result, empathetic people are usually excellent at managing relationships , listening , and relating to others. They avoid stereotyping and judging too quickly, and they live their lives in a very open, honest way.
Social Skills – It’s usually easy to talk to and like people with good social skills, another sign of high EI. Those with strong social skills are typically team players. Rather than focus on their own success first, they help others develop and shine. They can manage disputes, are excellent communicators, and are masters at building and maintaining relationships.
Or, try this
I dream a world where man
No other man will scorn,
Where love will bless the earth
And peace its paths adorn
I dream a world where all
Will know sweet freedom’s way,
Where greed no longer saps the soul
Nor avarice blights our day.
A world I dream where black or white,
Whatever race you be,
Will share the bounties of the earth
And every man is free,
Where wretchedness will hang its head
And joy, like a pearl,
Attends the needs of all mankind-
Of such I dream, my world!
Learning to accept loss and gain, good-repute and ill-repute, praise and censure, sorrow and happiness all with detachment, equally, for oneself and for others.
It is a clear-minded tranquil state of mind.
It refers to the equanimity that arises from the power of observation, the ability to see without being caught by what we see.
“Being in the middle” refers to balance, to remaining centered in the middle of whatever is happening.
This balance comes from inner strength or stability.
The strong presence of inner calm, well-being, confidence, vitality, or integrity can keep us upright, like a ballast keeps a ship upright in strong winds.
As inner strength develops, equanimity follows.