I have bionic Rottweilers that piss nerve gas and have three rows of titanium shark teeth.
I have a dead-loyal bunch of absolutely ruthless, buck naked Liberian ex-child soldiers from Charlie Taylor’s “Boy Brigade”, armed to the tits with TDI KRISS Super V Machine guns, flamethrowers, MP7A1s, 50-cal Barett sniper rifles, silenced High-Standard .22 assassination pistols and MP-5s, quite a handful of grenade launchers and all the meth they can smoke.
Excerpt from Caligula for President: Better American Living Through Tyranny, Cintra Wilson
In this inventive and biting satire, acclaimed novelist and cultural critic Cintra Wilson reimagines America’s Manifest Destiny as helmed by Caligula, the only leader in world history capable of turning our floundering democracy into a fully functioning-and totally fun-tyranny, both here and abroad. With Caligula running the show, America will finally be able to achieve what the founding fathers really wanted, but never had the nerve to admit.